Think back to when you were a little kid, like little little, like maybe three or four. You didn’t have a care in the world, right? I’ve noticed that kids of that age don’t have to worry about religion and they don’t really have to worry what people do or think or say. But think about yourself now.

Think about it, I mean really think about it.

What I want to know is, why if at that age you didn’t have to worry about religions or whether or not there was a killer waiting for you to come outside, WHY? Why now? Okay, religion I can understand, but I also want to know, what made you become Pagan/Wiccan? And as a teen, was your family Pagan/Wiccan? Or were they another religion? Maybe Christian? Maybe something different?

Well the point is, when you were little, no matter how old you are now, you didn’t really have worry about anything, but now that you’re ‘older’ you have to worry about a lot, right? And you also have a lot to think about. Maybe what college to go to? Maybe you are asking yourself, What job am I going to get next? What job should I get with my current living, sitch’? Here are some questions I’ve been asking myself for a long time. My questions are:

When I die what is my family going to do with my body?

And what if I have kids?

How will I leave them?

And what if my husband doesn’t die with me?

If it were my choice to pick where I wanted to be buried, I would pick someplace nice and quiet, but not too quiet, and I would choose to be buried with my husband and children. And on my grave stone, I would have the Pagan symbol.

What if my kids didn’t want to be buried with me? Then they have a right to be buried with or wherever they want. I don’t have all the answers, but as time goes on, I’m sure they will come willingly. If not? Then I’ll figure something out. So for those people asking the same or similar questions as I am, just think. Don’t feel, just think, the answers come more easily that way.

I’ve always thought if you just tried to ‘fit in’ things were better off, but guess what? ‘Fitting in’ is all right, but not fitting in is the best thing ever, because people never know what to expect from you; they never know what you’re going to say or do.

So stop trying to fit in. Stop trying to be whatever, or everything, that people want to see.

Be who you want to be.

In the morning, I awaken to the flickering of shadows as they dance across my bedroom. I see something that looks like a cat, which is no surprise. I have fourteen of them.

But this is my grandma’s house, in Pennsylvania, and it was June 14th that my grandma’s most beloved cat passed away. His name was August (we mostly just called him Augie). He was seventeen years old.

I rise from the king-sized bed that once belonged to my grandfather. Grandpa died a couple of years ago, though it feels like yesterday. He was bed-ridden; the cats would climb up and sleep in between his legs, especially Tremont. When I was a kid, my mom told me, “When a cat lies on your stomach, it means that he or she wants to make you feel better.” Something about a cat having healing abilities, or the skills to sense an unbalance in another living creature. Maybe that was why Tremont spent the last few days of my grandfather’s life curled up in his lap.

Today, I sense a presence. It’s Augie. I smile and climb out of bed. “Augie, is that you?” The sunlight dances through the crystals and the glass beads that hang in the windows of my grandfather’s old bedroom. This room is a legacy of life and death, of happiness and sorrow, a conglomeration of everything that it means to be alive.

A shadow passed toward the door. I follow it.

I step outside into a beautiful summer day. I’m on the back porch of my grandmother’s house, surveying her beautiful garden, where flowers of all types intertwine, reminding me of a painting by Monet. In the backyard, I see something that wasn’t there before–and altar.

The altar sits atop of large tree stump, the remnants of an ancient oak. “Augie?”

He’s sitting on top of the altar, amongst a few candles and some crystals, staring up toward the sky. “Mew,” he says.

“Augie, what are you doing here?”

He turns and looks at me. He doesn’t speak (at least not the way I speak)… But I hear his words. Just checking on Grandma, he says.

I smile. “She’s okay. She’s going to be just fine.”

He nods. And disappears.

I was my own ash cloud then, taking a drag from a cigarette.  Cancer, they said.   Pick your poison, I say.  There are worse things than death.   Letting yourself feel was only one form of suicide; no worse than smoking.   No worse than deprivation or indulgence.

A wise woman once told me that there is no such thing as an addictive personality.   That the way you understood, the way you dealt with things, was directly reflective of what you were hiding from; what you wanted to forget. Before the ash, before the smoke, philosophers spoke of a void in the spirit of man.   Some even theorized that the whole of the world would disappear into this gaping maw in man’s search for wealth and meaning.  It was too late now; there was no way for those poor bastards to know that those things did not necessarily go hand in hand.

No more smoke; only a smoldering stub was left.  Sadness flickers across eyes already tight with suffering, already flat with malcontent.  To be a an addict was to be aware of yourself, of everything that was wrong.  Never hurt another living being, except yourself.   Hide the gaping maw within with ash and smoke.

I’ve always wondered why people wear stones, and or carry them around. I’ve also wondered why when my family does Blessings, Dad wears stones around his neck. My Mom said it’s because it protects you. Some good stones to get are Bloodstone and Amber. Bloodstone is a good protection stone. Amber is good to help clear the mind.

Some really easy stones to find in the store are Tiger’s Eye and Amethyst. The Tiger’s Eye color should be yellow-brown. It also helps treat depression and clear the mind. Amethyst’s color is a kind of purple and/or violet. Amethyst also helps relive stress and depression. They should be really easy to find. It just depends “witch ” store you go to.

I really like wearing stones because depending on the stone, I feel friendly and great. For those of you who don’t believe stones can do much, try it for yourself and see how great you feel. So try and discover life.

Want more info? Visit:

Magical Crystals and Gemstones

Tiger’s Eye

Angel Starr is a 14 year old Pagan, from West Virginia. She is just getting in to paganism.

I have a book idea given to me by Dr. Rebecca Parker- what the Unitarian Universalists call a “commonplace book”. It includes quotes, discussion notes, activities, references and more to help me develop liturgy, sermons, etc.

I suppose it was inevitable that I became a Witch. I spent most of my childhood feeling like an outsider, even in my own family. It’s not necessarily that I was deliberately excluded (although there was plenty of that at times- most kids experience that at one time or another), but there was something “not quite right” about me- that made me not fit in. It’s like people could smell it on me, and it made them wary.

I was more comfortable communing with animals and invisible friends (whom my mother called “imaginary”, although they were anything but!) than with most humans, be they adult or child. I liked the slower and more visual, picture-based communication of non-humans much better and could relate to them more than the “strange human creatures” (as I called them then) I found myself among.

It’s funny (yet predictable, in hindsight) to note that the people I did become close to during my childhood and teenage years all turned out to be either queer or some stripe of pagan or both. Not that we knew this at the time- at the time, we were just the freaks, the outsiders.

The role of the Witch is to be an edgewalker. (For those of you non-Witch readers, this is one of the reasons why many Witches identify as Hedge Witches- the hedge is the boundary between this world and the next.) Edgewalker, as a term, implies a few things to me: risk, danger, not having a home in either of the definitive camps of this or that- but rather being perpetually “between”.

Witches exist as a living bridge between this world and the next and can affect both places.  To be a Witch is to be fully human, bridging the realms of our animal selves and our Divine natures- and at the same time- Witches, separate, odd, queer, uncanny.  To be fully human makes a Witch a master in all realms- a co-creator of the worlds who is not controlled. Witches are not slaves- to culture, to others, to force. (Yet we are human, which also means we can fail, falter, and become subject to the whims of others and cultural power dynamics seeking to rule us.)

So, if I am separate, how does my role as religious leader (as my school likes to call each of us), priestess, and mother come into it all? That, dear reader, is the big enchilada of questions.  My nature often makes me such a curmudgeon, a misanthrope (especially when I look and see all the harm that humans do to one another, the planet and its other inhabitants) and yet I am perpetually hopeful and intent on making this world a little better than how I found it.  I am an organizer, a catalyst.  I make stuff happen.  This has lead to some amazing activism and art projects over the years, and my current projects in the greater pagan community are all being documented at my personal website. Here’s the great paradox (Feri Witches love paradox!): as a Witch I am separate, but as a Witch, I know that there is no such thing.  We are all connected and we all affect one another.

Being connected makes me want to teach my son the value of compassion, exercising a Witches’ Will to manifest a better world, and staying connected to others, despite all of our collective failings.  In short, Being a Witch and an edgewalker has helped me cultivate Power, but it took becoming a parent to make me feel more compassion for human frailty. I am still working on this- I find that it is easy with my son, but not so easy with others!

I tend to be a judgmental person who doesn’t cut anyone (including myself) enough slack for mistakes and failings.  That is my default tendency, and it is something that I am actively working on now- because as a parent, I want my son to thrive in a loving, compassionate environment that values his successes and failings equally.  Through parenting my son, I am finding the patience to deal with the people “out there” who annoy the crap out of me.  Being a mother is making me a better person, which in turn, makes me a better Witch and priestess.

]]> http://paganwriters.com/2010/08/06/reflections-from-my-book-of-shadows-the-witch-as-edgewalker/feed/ 0 http://paganwriters.com/2010/08/06/review-sacred-land/ http://paganwriters.com/2010/08/06/review-sacred-land/#comments Fri, 06 Aug 2010 23:53:00 +0000 Katherine Turcotte http://paganwriters.com/?p=1242 Sacred Land: Intuitive Gardening for Personal, Political & Environmental Change by Clea Danaan. Llewellyn Worldwide, St. Paul, 2007

The title of this book sounds very formal which tended to make me think it would perhaps be a very serious ho-hum read. I was wrong – it is however, a very informative book filled with fascinating and useful information.

Living in a time when the damage to the earth has become apparent, Clea Danaan sheds a new light and new hope on our situation. She writes,

“This book is a beginning place, a launching point for your own sacred work. You will be inspired to seek out other sources to learn more about how to garden and to learn more about the goddesses and ecological activism. I write for women who are rediscovering the power of the sacred feminine in their lives, and who want to use that power to create positive change in the world.”

On our journey throughout the book we are introduced to many garden goddesses. There is the goddess Aurora who “rides into each morning on Pegasus the winged horse or in a purple and golden chariot”. We can bring her blessing upon our garden by the simple and beautiful ritual of lighting a rose-colored candle anointed with morning dew on the spring equinox. Along with the ancient deities we are then inspired by the many “Sacred Sisters” of today. One such sister is Rosemary Gladstar, famed herbalist and President of United Plant Savers, an organization dedicated to the preservation of threatened native medicinal plants.

By studying the earth, the cycles of life and ecology we learn on this journey to appreciate the co-inhabitants of the four elements that share our garden space as well. From ants to bees, butterflies and earthworms to devas such as faeries, gnomes, sylphs, undines & naiads all that have their purpose in nourishing our earth and life.

As we tend to the three gardens – the one in our backyard, in the world and the garden of our spirit (done through some very powerful and thought provoking meditations) we are inspired to become activists armed with the knowledge to make positive changes for personal, political and environmental change.  So, don’t let the title fool you, this book contains a wealth of information that needs to be practiced and shared.

What a great way to make use of the summer bounty of fresh fruits and berries! Cordials are much more predictable to make than wines and you can control the proof of it by carefully measuring out the alcohol that you use. It is also easy to control the sweetness. True to taste because the fruit need not ferment and also easy to correct should you find your cordial not sweet enough or you need to add more alcohol. The one cardinal rule however when making homemade cordials is to use ripe fruit that is unblemished.

Cordials from Your Kitchen covers the basics of choosing the appropriate alcohol base, and there are many; pure grain alcohol, whiskey, vodka, brandy, rum and gin. Also discussed are the addition of water, sweeteners, flavorings (you are provided with a huge list of common flavorings for liqueurs), coloring and cream bases. The list of the right equipment you will need is not very long, and most of the items you will find that you already own. A great extra is the ideas for bottling, storing and gift ideas for your tasty treats.

Not only does this book cover the making of fruit cordials and liqueurs, but also many with nutty bases such as almond, macadamia nut, hazelnut and even a butter pecan liqueur, just to name a few. Spice liqueurs are also covered. Who could not resist the lure of trying Ginger-Honey Liqueur or the Liqueur of Love using Coriander? I think this fall I will try the Fall Spice one at Thanksgiving! Cream based cordials make up for a large portion of the recipes in this book – Banana Cream, Chocolate-Covered Cherry Cream, Coconut Cream, Raspberry Cream. And for those of us with a sweet tooth there are the candy cordials made with flavorings – English Toffee Liqueur, Peppermint Pattie and even a Butterscotch Liqueur.

Chapter eight covers the flavored brandies, rums, and vodkas and these sound absolutely delicious. Nice warm drinks for those cold winter nights. What is good about these is that most of these fruits are readily available so that they can be made in the summer in the peak of their ripeness and enjoyed months later – Apple Brandy, Apricot Brandy, Spiced Blackberry Brandy, a lovely Peach Brandy. Following these are the spiced rums and flavored vodkas.

Lastly, there is a chapter devoted to spirited fruits and an entire chapter of questions and answers. All in all, there are more than 100 easy recipes to suit every occasion and holiday – did I forget to mention there are even flavored coffee liqueurs! The authors have been kind enough to include a chart to convert recipe measurements to metric, a glossary, a source list for flavorings,  and even gift tags you can copy and use for your homemade treats.

So, if you haven’t begun to gather up the fruits of summer, now is a great time to gather them to make gifts that will surely impress your friends. Be sure to keep some for your own enjoyment!

I’m a teenage Pagan living in a Christian world.  It’s hard to be a teenage Pagan, in a world where pretty much everyone I know is a Christian. But I make it work for me; I listen to what they have to say. Occasionally,  I even go to church with friends. Even after being in a town with a very Christian mayor, I still don’t understand why they can’t just stop looking at us as if we’re crazy when we say “I’m pagan and/or Wiccan”, when most of what is said in the Bible connects to our religion, in one way or another.

Here’s what I’d tell other pagan teens in the same world I am in. Follow your stars. Not someone else’s. Just know that your star has five points, and life is nothing but a journey. You have to find the fork in the road, with the path that looks right to you.

Some things I will never do in a Christian community. I will never go around telling random people “Oh yeah, I’m pagan.”   If I did, they might say I worshipped the devil. I’d say “No, I don’t worship the Devil, and just because I don’t believe what you believe, does not mean I’m a devil worshipper.” They might get angry.  To  be honest though, if they can’t handle who you are and what religion you have, then they were not meant to be in your life.  Just remember, the people who don’t care what religion you have or what you look like, who just want to be around you, those, my friend, are the ones who were truly meant to be in your life.

Don’t worry about people in your past, there’s a reason they didn’t make it to your future.

Angel Starr is a 14 year old Pagan, from West Virginia. She is just getting in to paganism.

My partner, Steve, and I had made the journey to go to a graduation. Seeing the still-obvious destruction made me flash back to those days after the hurricane, and started a great deal of thinking about the ways that we should be helping “our own”, whether it is after a natural tragedy, an illness, or just plain mismanagement.

Although my family lost its home and belongings, we were lucky; we weren’t planning on evacuating. A very persistent friend of mine finally convinced us to come stay with him and his wife for a few days. After all, he reminded me, everyone loves a barbeque, and it would be a great occasion to have a barbeque and relax. We should just consider it a good old-fashioned Southern get-together.

At the last possible minute, some friends from my old neighborhood decided that if I was leaving, they were too. (I’m not certain that says anything good about my level of stubbornness!) When we arrived in northern Louisiana, it wasn’t just me and my children; it was a total of seven adults, two teens, and four kids. We were toting a bird, a hamster, two cats, and four dogs. We arrived at two in the morning, after 13 hours on the road. We’d traveled only 220 miles during that time, in the company of hundreds of thousands of other evacuees.

My friend didn’t complain, didn’t ask who all these people were. He just led us to his mother’s house (which was quite luckily vacant) and tucked us in. The next morning, things looked good; the hurricane hadn’t done much damage and within a day or two, we’d be home. Imagine our surprise, and our friends’ surprise, when the levee broke. Plans to go home were quickly put on hold; there was no more ‘home’. Our friend introduced us to the pastor of the local Wesleyan Church, and we began the process of getting on. We stayed with my friends for a month, until Hurricane Rita was on the horizon and it was time to move north. Five years later, I’m up here in West Virginia and our other friends have scattered. Some went west, some went back to Louisiana. I hadn’t gone back to New Orleans since that time; it was just too painful to think about.

On our vacation, Steve and I made it a point to make the journey north to visit the couple who had been so generous not only to me and my family, but to all the strays that came with us. Not too many people would shelter 13 visitors for a month or more! We spent a delightful day with this couple, and then stopped to visit the pastor and his wife, who had helped thousands of evacuees through a mission established by their church.

The pastor’s wife was home. It was a lovely visit, and the conversation led to this article. The pastor’s wife was talking with us about the days after the Hurricane and how they’d worked such long hours to ensure that those who needed it got food, clothing, diapers, and even makeup and yes, sexy underwear to help us ladies feel human again (we needed it, believe me). She pointed out that people don’t really want to hear about God when they are hungry; they need to be fed first. And, while she believed we are all God’s children, she considers it important to remember that some people will use donations to improve their situation and to help their family, while some will simply be users.

This concept applies to Pagan communities, too. All communities, all churches, can fall victim to people who want the money from the help more than they want the help itself. This delightful woman shared with us what she’d learned over her years as a pastor’s wife. Here are her rules for helping, while minimizing the chances of getting taken advantage of.

Never give out money. If people in your congregation need their electric bill paid, pay it directly.

Take people who need food to the grocery store, and buy them groceries.

Buy their children clothing and shoes.

If the person says they have to get to another town, drive them, or buy them a non-refundable or train ticket. Take them to the depot and watch them get on the bus.

If the person says they need gas, follow them to the gas station and pump (and pay) for gas for them.

In today’s busy world, money is tight. Most of us like to help people when we can, particularly when they seem to be deserving and especially when they are a member of our congregation or worship group. With resources being limited, however, it is far better to be absolutely sure that whatever you contribute will go for what the person needs, and not what they want. If you find out that a donation from the congregation has been misused, think twice before helping that individual again. Here’s an example for you.

A congregation member has a spouse in the hospital, and needs money to drive back and forth to see the spouse. The congregation rallies around them, and provides money to fill up the gas tank plus some extra. The next day, you find out that the member hasn’t been visiting their spouse at all. Instead, they’ve been driving a neighbor to a nearby state to see their girlfriend. Clearly, the donation was misused; think twice before donating to this member again.

If a congregation member needs help with an especially high electric bill, by all means help them out. But remember, this is a “one time good deal”, not an ongoing support. Congregation members must be encouraged to stand on their own to the extent possible, and help should be just that, help – not a monthly stipend.

The Wesleyan Church in Louisiana knew that my family was Pagan. They also know that we believe in more than one God. That didn’t stop them from helping us, and from being our friends and foundation the month after Katrina. If and when another disaster occurs, we need to keep in mind that it is not the religion that matters, it is the fact that when people are hungry, they need to be fed. They need to be housed, to have gas for their car and food for their cats. As a congregation, we need to take steps to help others, while still protecting our own resources. The pastor’s wife understood this, and I am very glad that she passed this along. We are, after all, all God’s children, regardless of the name of the God or Gods.


Several years ago I picked up my virtual writing quill after several years of relative writing inactivity. The previous decade, I had identified as a neo-Pagan or “Goddess-woman.” My writing during that time included papers for graduate school, occasional poetry to exorcise my angst, and crafting of various Pagan Rituals. Then I had kids, and effectively lost my mind for several years.

When I re-emerged from that fog about four years ago, I decided to write one of the many stories rattling through my brain. It was essentially a speculative fiction story, set in a future USA and containing a few steampunk elements (a term I didn’t know about until about two years ago). Concurrently, I had an opportunity to submit something to a Pagan anthology. I decided to force my story into a “Pagan” mold, but I didn’t have enough time to write it well. Juggling a full-time job, a husband, and two kids under age six did not leave me an abundance of extra time. In doing so I committed several sins that I warn other writers not to make:

WRITING SIN #1: Don’t make your story fit a mold it doesn’t belong in.

WRITING SIN #2: Don’t submit something unless it’s at least reasonably “done”–this includes editing and proofreading. It is your name at the stake.

The story I wrote in two weeks during stolen moments was bad. I’m not being hard on myself—it was really not good. The basic narrative was set in my speculative fiction world, but I threw in Pagan elements that didn’t fit. Plus, I did not give it the time it deserved because I simply didn’t have the time.. I remember making bleary-eyed edits an hour before the submission deadline.

I don’t think I need to tell you that it was not accepted.

Your Writing Identity

When I received the rejection I cried a bit, although I was not surprised. Processing over the subsequent week, I realized I had gained some valuable insights. I loved to write. It was a blast! I hadn’t written a short story since my undergraduate years. The fact that I jumped back into a dusty and unprepared saddle, was rejected, and yet had so much fun was telling. I also realized that despite identifying as a Pagan, what I really wanted to write—and what I adored reading—was speculative fiction and science fiction.

I still read and write Pagan content, and am committed to helping other Pagan-friendly writers of fiction and non-fiction find outlets for their unique voices. But I do not have to identify solely as a Pagan writer, and I often feel more kinship with my fellow sci fi and spec-fiction writers and poets.

I offer other Pagan-friendly writers the following items to consider:

Be circumspect about how you label your writing. If you write more than Pagan-themed YA fiction, for example, make sure you don’t write yourself into a box.

Look around for markets and outlets for your writing. There are many creative ways to write and most will compensate you in some way.

As a Pagan writer, you may know a lot about science and nature topics, mythology, or ancient symbols. Look for science or academic journals that may welcome your expertise or perspective.

If you are a beginner, it is okay to write for a byline or a contributors’ copy. * Again, be creative. Offer to write newsletters for small businesses or local organizations. Offer to edit others’ writing. Writing reviews is a good way to get writing, and get your name “out there”.

Take your writing seriously. Even if you only have five hours per week to spend writing, be serious about those hours. Create boundaries to protect that time. If you don’t respect it, no one else will.

Network: Facebook, Twitter, and blogs are your friends. Find like-content writers to follow. Attend conferences. Join online communities of interest.

Network some more.

Read as much as you can. Read outside your genre; it will make your writing more well-rounded.

Get writing!

* Of course a humble start-up such as the PWC—which is volunteer run—may not be able to compensate you beyond a byline. I believe that in this particular circumstance, it is okay. *wink*